I Know You Care
by paperflowers622
Summary: Imagining how Avery and Juliette deal with each other after she comes back in Cadence's life. The title of the story is inspired by the Ellie Goulding song of the same name, which I think is/will be fitting for them at this point in their relationship.
1. Chapter 1

It was always strange coming to Juliette's house, what used to be his house too, as a visitor.

Even before he had moved in, when they were just dating, her house had become like his second home. He had spent the night there countless times, kept clothes in her dresser, dropped in whenever he pleased, used his key at will.

Now he knocked and waited for Juliette to come to the door, let him inside.

As he entered the threshold, Avery noticed that she had packed up Cadence's diaper bag and placed it near the front door.

"She's sleeping," Juliette said, closing the door behind him. "I put her down about a half-hour ago."

Avery shoved his hands in his pockets, because he didn't know what else to do with them. "Any problems?"

Juliette shook her head, looking proud. "No, she didn't even cry once."

"Good, good..." he said, trailing off. He felt awkward. It wasn't always that way between them, in this co-parenting journey they were embarking on. One might think it would be weird all the time, considering Avery still had full custody and was slowly expanding Juliette's visitation and time with Cadence the more he came to trust her.

No, it was awkward for him right now because of the reason he had asked Juliette to watch Cadence tonight - he had gone on a date. But they weren't talking about that.

Juliette didn't seem to notice the tension he felt as she informed him of what Cadence had eaten for dinner, how she had laughed as Juliette played "airplane" with her food, and that Juliette was pretty sure Cadence's unintelligible sounds were really close to becoming actual words.

He felt his chest tightening, perhaps his heart squeezing, and he tried to ignore it. He thought back to his date, which had been with a musician named Tara. He'd met her one night at the 5 Spot, where he was picking up gigs here and there. They'd had fun, eating dinner on South 2nd Street downtown and then getting coffee at the Frothy Monkey.

He'd dropped her off without a goodnight kiss though, because he didn't want to lead her on. He wasn't sure what he wanted to happen.

Juliette led Avery back to Cadence's nursery, which still looked exactly the same as it had after they decorated it together before the birth. Juliette stood by and watched as Avery gently picked up Cadence from the crib, holding his breath as he waited to see if she would stir. She didn't, her body curling into her father's chest as she continued to suck on her thumb, eyes shut tight.

"She's such a good baby," Juliette said, her voice quiet.

Avery looked down at Cadence, then back up to Juliette. Her eyes were still on her baby, and the love that shone in her eyes was unmistakable. She had come a long way from the stressed new mother who was so weighed down by postpartum depression that all she could do was run away from reality.

He knew he could trust her with Cadence now, that ultimately she had been sick and had finally taken the steps to get better. He knew she loved her child and regretted everything that had happened. He knew he would never threaten to keep Cadence away from her like he had in the past. He knew a lot of other things too, things he couldn't admit to himself because his heart couldn't take it.

Juliette walked with him back to the front of the house and watched as he fastened Cadence into her car seat. After that was done, he turned back to his estranged wife.

"Well... thanks for keeping her on such short notice," he said.

Juliette bit her lip and nodded. "Yeah, of course. So... how was your night?"

He blanched, and she quickly shook her head. "You don't have to tell me."

"That's okay, uh, it was fine. We went to -"

"You know what?" Juliette interrupted, flinching. "On second thought, maybe don't tell me, I just... I don't know if I can..."

She turned away from him and picked up Cadence's blanket that was on top of the diaper bag, shaking it out and folding it again.

"Juliette," he said.

She put the blanket down and slowly turned to face him. Her eyes were wet.

"I'm sorry," she said. "It's just when you said 'we' and you were talking about you and somebody else. I just ... I..."

A few tears escaped down her cheeks, and Avery had to stop himself from tearing up as well. "I'm sorry," he said.

He pulled her to him, hugging her even as his mind screamed at him to get out of there as fast as he could. His track record was pretty set in stone. Try as he might to resist her, he could never do so for long. Even though he'd been destroyed by her - twice - he never wanted to see her in pain.

"We'll get through this," he whispered. He felt her nod against him, and she slowly disentangled herself from his arms.

Wiping her face, she walked around him and unlocked the front door, opening it slightly.

"Listen," she said, collecting herself. "I'm sorry I did that just now. I know you have to move on. I have to let you."

He nodded, looking away even as she tried to look him directly in his eyes. Her brave face faltered for a second, and her voice broke as she spoke.

"I'm going to love you until the day I die," she said, and as those words hit him, he felt himself break too. "And I love you too much to risk hurting you again. So please just forget my little meltdown here tonight and go on another date and don't feel guilty about it, okay? Just... maybe we'll wait a little while before you start telling me about your love life."

Avery blinked back tears that had been threatening and swallowed. She was giving him an out, and at least tonight, he had to take it.

"I'll see you Wednesday when I drop off Cadence again," he said. Juliette nodded, then squatted down to kiss Cadence's head.

"Good night baby girl," she whispered. "I love you."

As Avery watched them together, his two girls, he wondered again why he couldn't still have the family he'd always wanted. If he could trust Cadence with Juliette, why couldn't he trust himself with her too?

But then he remembered the divorce papers currently being processed and the pain and the promise he had made to himself never to go through that again.

With a renewed resolve that would probably last only about thirty more seconds unless he got out of there, Avery picked up the carrier and diaper bag and left the house, quickly saying goodbye as he passed Juliette on his way out.

He knew deep down that this wasn't over. Maybe it never would be. But at least tonight, he had won another battle between his heart and his mind.


	2. Chapter 2

_**I originally wrote the first chapter as a one shot, but then I decided to add to it, so this is the conclusion.**_

Juliette turned on the electric kettle in the kitchen and set out a variety of tea bags nearby, along with two mugs and some Milano cookies. Avery was supposed to be here any minute.

She walked back to her bathroom and briefly checked her reflection in the mirror, then peeked in on a sleeping Cadence in the nursery again. With nothing left to do but wait, she settled on the couch with the baby monitor in her hand.

It had been five months since she left the treatment center and began the long process of repairing her life. That process had revolved around her number one priority - her relationship with her daughter.

Juliette knew Cadence had to be her main focus as she continued to get better and overcome the postpartum depression that had almost ruined her life. As she fell more in love with her daughter, she had tried to simultaneously accept the fact that the husband she was already irreparably in love with was not going to take her back.

According to their lawyers, the divorce would be finalized next month. She both dreaded and actively avoided thinking about how she would feel on that day.

Avery knew how she felt - she had broken down one night and told him she would always love him. He hadn't said it back, and she had not expected him to. He had seemed grateful and relieved when she told him she was letting him go.

And she knew she had no right to ask him to forgive her. He was already doing more than she expected with the time he allowed her to have with Cadence. It was more than she could have ever dreamed after he'd once told her he wanted to eradicate her parental rights, basically never see her again.

For the first couple months of her visits, Avery would stay only a few minutes each time as he dropped off and picked up Cadence. She knew he wanted to hold her at arm's length, keep from getting too close, and she respected that.

Things had slowly been changing lately, though. He would come to get Cadence, and instead of heading straight to the nursery, he would take off his jacket, sit on the couch, ask her questions, make their talks last longer. She was always careful not to ask for more than he would give, not to take more than he was offering. But she did start making him tea.

Their discussions about Cadence inevitably drifted to his day and her day, how his producing career was going, how she felt about the new album she was working on. She even confided in him about her ongoing therapy sessions, and how they were helping her deal with issues she'd had long before she had a baby, long before she met him.

One thing they did not talk about was Tara, the woman Avery had been seeing for two and a half months now. And he did not ask her if she was interested in seeing anyone, though the answer to that would be a resounding no.

She had not wanted anyone else since the day she realized she wanted him.

She heard his tentative knock on the door, and her heart jumped. Hurrying to let him in, she was surprised at the harried look on his face.

"Everything okay?" she asked.

He nodded.

"You seem a little weird," she said, smiling at him.

"I'm fine," he responded, but his voice didn't sound right.

Juliette gave him a look, then turned to walk to the kitchen. "Okay, well, I'm sadly out of mint tea, but I've got Chai, orange, black and this breakfast kind that will keep you up until 3 a.m. if you drink it now," she said, chuckling to herself.

"Whatever you want to make is fine," he said.

She made them both cups of Chai tea, added a little milk, then sat down next to him on the couch.

"Cadence threw up on me after dinner, and it was like that scene from 'The Exorcist,'" Juliette said.

"I ended it," Avery replied.

Juliette almost spilled her tea, which she had been about to sip, on herself. "Huh?"

"With Tara," he said, looking down at his clasped hands. "I broke up with her."

Juliette's heart began to pound, and she set the mug down on the coffee table. "Oh, that's... too bad?"

Avery shook his head. "I tried to make it work. It should have been what I needed."

Juliette stayed quiet. He continued.

"When I come here and I see you holding her and loving her, it's everything I want, and it makes it impossible for me to get over you," he said. "It's highly unfair."

She sighed, shrugging her shoulders. "I never wanted you to get over me. I just want you to be happy, and I know I've made you very unhappy in the past."

"You've ruined me," he said.

She nodded in a defeated way. "I've ruined you."

"I thought it was in a bad way," he said. His blue eyes were glistening, but he had a hint of a smile on his lips. "Every time I try to live without you, I can't. I know you regret hurting me, but I know I've hurt you too. I gave up on you, and I'm sorry for that."

She was crying now, still unsure where he was going with this.

"Since you got back to Nashville, you have proven to be the strong, loving woman and mother I always knew you would be," he said. "And I did not want to admit that at first, because then I might have to consider that it might have been a mistake to file for divorce so quickly. That scared me."

He let out a deep breath.

"But now it scares me even more to think that I might let you go and then regret it for the rest of my life."

He looked up, examining her face. Slowly he reached up a hand and wiped her tears away with his thumb.

"Please," he said, and then he leaned forward and kissed her.

She was in shock at first. For so long she had been wondering what he was feeling, if he still loved her. This was all so sudden.

As he pulled her closer, Juliette relaxed into him, letting him show her exactly how he felt with his lips and his tongue and his hands. His fingers were in her hair, then they moved to cup her face.

But the longer and more urgently they kissed, the more her usual doubts and fears began to fill her mind.

 _Is he going to pull away? Is he going to keep going and then regret it as soon as it's over?_

As much as she didn't want to do anything to break this spell, she had to know he wasn't going to turn around later and say it had been a mistake. She couldn't just do a one night stand with him. If he made love to her and then walked out the door, she wasn't sure her heart would recover.

She gently pulled back, her face still only inches from his. Searching his eyes, she forced her mouth to form the words.

"Are you sure about this, Avery? I don't want you to throw me away after."

Avery shook his head and pressed his forehead against hers.

"What did I tell you?"

He didn't have to repeat the words he had said to her long ago, in this very room. She would never forget them. _You're no throwaway._

Accepting his lips against hers again, she helped him slip her shirt over her head. They continued kissing as they stood, stumbling to the bedroom, to the bed they had shared together once upon a time.

Unbuttoning his shirt and pushing it off his shoulders, she allowed herself to smile, finally believing that this was really happening.

He smiled back, then leaned down and kissed her neck just where she always liked it. They finished undressing each other, and it was just as it had always been, except better. He knew her body like a song he had written himself.

Afterward, he held her from behind as they lay together in silence.

"I love you," he whispered finally, his face buried in her hair. "I can't stop loving you."

"Do you remember our first night together?" she asked.

"Of course."

Juliette had come to Avery's apartment that night, offering him her mother's pink macaroni and a confession of needing him more than she needed anything else.

After they had made love for the first time, they'd reveled in their happiness for an hour or two before Juliette was the first to give in to sleep. She had had a hard week, and as much as she wanted to savor their first night together, she had been unable to stay awake one moment longer.

Then, at some point in the middle of the night, she woke up, yet kept her eyes closed. She felt Avery holding her, and then he leaned down, still thinking she was asleep, and whispered, "I'm going to take care of you."

She'd never told him before that she had heard him say that. She told him now.

"I want to promise you that I'm going to take care of you, too," she said. "We'll take care of each other."

And as he took her hand, sliding his fingers between hers, she knew without a doubt that he believed her.


End file.
